I might just be the most boring person in the world, or at least out of my friends.
Seriously, lately I have been talking to these people and they’re doing wild and crazy things, while the wildest thing I’ve done is hit the snooze button three times.
Kennice just got back from backpacking through Europe for six weeks. While in Europe not only did she brave (aka loved every minute of it) going out with six Italian men one night, but she also went sky diving.
Please let it be known that the only time I will be jumping out of a plane is if it is crashing to the ground and jumping out is the only way to save my life.
My sister just got back form a month in Italy. While there she studied opera and sang in one of Italy’s greatest opera venues. She also spent a week in Germany with a guy who is going to compose an orchestra piece for/about her.
Yeah……I almost have no words for that one. I only sing in the shower or drunken karaoke singing at Trader Todds. The closest I’ve come to beautiful music being about/for me was when I dated Mr. Frat boy and he put aviators on and serenaded me with “You’ve Lost That Loving Felling.” Oh it was a spectacle, I wish…WISH…I had video of it.
Matt and Tom are in Australia swimming with sharks and going on outback tours.
My roommates are going camping in the next couple weeks. I mean REAL camping. NO indoor plumbing building where you can take showers or use toilets, and I think they have to watch out for bears. Awwwwww, it’s too bad I have classes on Saturdays. ;)
Kate has driven cross country in a quest to see random shit across America.
However great all these things are, I would have to say my most interesting friends with the most interesting lives are, of course, Kayla and Brett. Actually, it’s Kayla more then anything, but Brett is along for the “ride” so we’ll include him.
So a couple of days ago I get a call from Kayla, and she is bitching and moaning about her and Brett having conflicting work schedules. She’s going on and on about how she has been working nights and gets home after he leaves for work in the morning. (Her vet clinic is short staffed at the moment.)
While one might think that this is her sadness for not being able to spend more time together, “one” might be wrong. Nope, she’s complaining because they have not had sex in two weeks.
Two weeks?? Kayla hunny, add about 166 weeks to those two and we’ll talk about who has the right to complain about a lack of sex life.
Anyway, yesterday about 4:00sih she calls me again (its 3:00 her time), but this time she is all happy and giddy.
“JOANIE!!! I couldn’t take it anymore. After I took care of the dogs I got into my car, drove the 30 minutes into Denver, walked into his office, slammed the door and told him we were F***ing right there and then. So we did it…….on his desk………twice.”
She’s such a porn star. WHO DOES THAT???? I really thought things like this only happened in movies, but no…..they happen to Kayla and Brett.
Never, ever have I had the urge to march into my boyfriend’s office and demand sex on the desk. OK, maybe the thought has crossed my mind (when I had someone to cross it about) but I don’t think I would ever have the guts to carry it out.
This just the latest installments on why I am convinced that Kayla is really an alien with the goal of world domination. She’ll just sex to death all the men, lesbians, bi-sexuals and drunken sorostitutes in the world while the rest of us look on in shock.
I can hear her laughing now. I am sure once she reads this post I am going to get a call, texted or email “What, jealous?”
And the answer is Yes…..yes I am.
No comments:
Post a Comment